Thursday, March 29, 2012

Friday, March 23, 2012

Andrew In Drag



A pity she does not exist
A shame he’s not a fag
The only girl I ever loved was
Andrew in drag

There is no hope of love for me
From here on I'll go stag
The only girl I’ll ever love is
Andrew in drag

Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Yeah

I don’t know why I even went
It’s really not my bag
Just thought it might be funny to see
Andrew in drag

The moment he walked on the stage
My tail began to wag
Wag like a little wiener dog for
Andrew in drag

Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Yeah

I’ve always been a ladies’ man
And I don’t have to brag
But I become a momma’s boy for
Andrew in drag

I’d sign away my trust fund
I would even sell the Jag
If I could spend my misspent youth with
Andrew in drag

Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Yeah

So stick him in a dress and
He’s the only boy I’d shag
The only boy I’d anything is
Andrew in drag

I’ll never see that girl again
He did it as a gag
I’ll pine away forevermore for
Andrew in drag

Thursday, March 15, 2012

God Help The Girl



There is no way I'm looking for a boyfriend
There is no way I'm looking for a scene
I need to save some dough
I'm a working girl, you know
I'll fend attention off I keep to myself

I love my room, I'm getting used to sleeping
Some nights I really like to lie awake
I hear the midnight birds
The message in their words
The dawn will touch me in a way a boy could never touch
Their promise never meant so much to me

You have been warned, I'm born to be contrary
Backward at school, I wrote from right to left
Teacher never cared for me
Preacher said a prayer for me
God help the girl, she needs all the help she can get

I sit for hours just waiting for his phone call
I'll leave the chocolate hidden in the fridge
I'll play his messages
Analyze his intonation
Please stop me there, I'm even boring myself

I think of him when I'm doing the dishes
I think of him while looking in the sink
This ain't no play on words
My love for him is absurd
If he gave me a sign I'd think about it for a week
I'd build it up and then I'd turn him down

Sunday, March 11, 2012